The Sound of Life

What’s your favorite thing in the world to hear? Am I safe to say it’s probably not babies crying? As of June 26th I would have agreed with you. But on the 27th of June at 6:31 AM in the darkness of a quiet labor and delivery room that’s all I wanted to hear.

Back up to 5:00 AM. My wife texted our mid-wife who was sleeping down the hall and told her she thought it was time to start pushing. When the team showed up they woke me up and we started getting ready. This was the 17th hour of labor and it was finally time to get down to business.

Unfortunately, my wife had developed a fever and it was causing Noelle’s heart rate to increase. They gave her Tylenol in the hopes that they could get the fever under control. When they came back 20 minutes later it was a little better, but not by much. They decided it was best to begin delivery.

My wife had an epidural a few hours beforehand so she wasn’t in any pain as she started pushing. Unlike what you see on TV, the room was silent. It was myself, the midwife, my wife, and a nurse. Besides our voices while coaching you could hear a pin drop. I didn’t know what to expect — would it be five pushes? Fifty? I hoped for five but prepared for fifty.

As we made more progress the midwife called in two NICU nurses. I wasn’t sure why or if they were just standard protocol. Later I found out she only did it “just in case” because of the baby’s heart rate due to my wife’s fever. It turned out to be a 4th inning game-winning decision. At 6:30 AM the midwife announced that the next push would be the last. She was right and Noelle made her way into the world.

The delivery was nothing like you’d expect and not a note you’d wish to end on. It was written on our midwife’s face that this relatively calm delivery just went from normal to serious. For lack of a better description, she threw the baby on my wife’s chest, immediately had me cut the cord, and handed Noelle off to the NICU nurses. I’ve never seen a newborn before (except in pictures) but my gut told me things didn’t look right. She wasn’t crying and she didn’t have much color.

My wife was asking the nurse and midwife why she wasn’t crying. Nobody would answer us except to give us the run-around — you know, those answers people give when they’re skirting liability issues? The NICU nurses were moving quickly and at one point called for assistance from the nurse. A few minutes and she still wasn’t crying. They explained they were putting a tube down her throat and I could hear a lot of suction. I held my wife’s hand and prayed — all I wanted to hear was a baby crying.

It turns out Noelle got distressed during delivery and her meconium was released which she got in her nose and mouth. Untreated, this can cause the baby to aspirate putting the baby at high risk. It was later explained to us that they prevent the baby from crying in order to prevent aspiration into the lungs. At minute one, Noelle was a two on the Apgar. Thanks to the quick response of the NICU nurses she was a 9 by the five minute mark.

It was about 25 minutes before we got to hold her. The longest 25 minutes of my life. But when I heard her cry for the first time the crushing weight of anxiety  and helplessness was lifted. I don’t think I can ever hear a baby crying and feel annoyed or bothered. The worst thing in the world is to want to hear your baby cry and not. It’s not a disturbance — it’s the sound of life.

{ The Photo }

In our nursery we have a glider with a foot stool. They both happen to be a very pretty shade of green. When looking around for a simple backdrop and not finding one, I just decided we’d lay Noelle on the footstool. The key light in this image is a Lumopro LP160 in a 24″ Lastolite EZ Box with a grid 45 degrees to the top right of Noelle’s head. There’s a silver reflector at camera left to kick light back into the shadows.

The LP160 is dialed down to its lowest power setting to allow me to shoot at f1.4 with the Canon 50mm 1.4. The entire shoot lasted less than 3 minutes and we got Noelle back to feeding. The image is edited 50% in Lightroom and 50% in Photoshop. Photoshop is where I did a lot of subtle work on the highlights, shadows, and sharpness. I also added additional texture to the already subtle texture the background had using a texture photo on a multiply layer.

Some would say this is a toss-image. Who wants a picture of their kid crying? I do. It’s going in her first year photo book. It might even go on my wall as a reminder of how precious and sensitive human life is. It might even be one of my favorites.